Red Lippy
West Ham Utd v Liverpool
Wednesday, 29th of January, 2020.
It was just that I wanted to be there, if and when Liverpool won this game. With my other ‘family’.
Davie answered the door and soon Fudge followed – more smooths and a cwtch; well, how could I refuse; she was everyone’s dog but Davie was her master.
I thought that I heard, just for an instant a female voice and no, it was not any of the three girls – but, but Carly’s, Davie’s wife’s voice.
Davie tried to convince me otherwise.
‘No, Carly’s not here’ he said, trying not to lie, or in Carly’s words, talk!
I scanned the table. There were four cups there. Like in a nursery rhyme, one for Deano, one for me, one for Davie and, and, well.
‘There’s four cups Davie, so Carly is here’.
‘Well observed inspector Crouch’, Deano said as Carly emerged from the kitchen. The gang was all here.
I did not fail to glance at the mound of sweets in the bowl too. ‘I did not get any’, I expressed sadly.
‘Don’t worry Crouch, we just got these from over the shop’ as I looked down enviously.
So, we caught-up and I told Carly that I had been heading for the bank on Monday morning, when she and her half-sister Lauren had been, ‘Going to the gym’ with their dad – a Manc.
‘Did I tell you where I am going in September?’, Deano said, looking straight faced as Alisson facing a free-kick.
‘Pearl, Har-bour’ I replied, thinking about that hulk of a rusting battleship which is still there after the surprise attack in December 1941, which was as quick as a Liverpool counter.
So, to the Liverpool team. The usual back-five which if I starred long and hard enough at my key-board – it should by now, type the reds line-up itself. Alisson in goals, Trent Alexander-Arnold and Andy Robertson at left-back. Gini Wijnaldum, captain Jordan Henderson and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain. With no Sadio Mane to call on due to a hamstring and hopefully back after the International Break, Divock Origi was paired with Bobby Firmino and Mo Salah.
West Ham were managed by David Moyes. Well, we all knew how he would set them-up, think of a double decker and double it so it made one of those bendy, stretchy buses which are prevalent on the continent. They were without Antonio and to be fair, I was not interested in them – so long as our collective team effort kept them out then that’s all I was worried about. Believe me though, I was a tad nervous – especially as we’d dropped vital points here last season; which cost us in the end.
All white top with black shorts. Just like in the 1980’s. Love it. And we were passing the ball ala that vintage too. But us being greedy and spoilt now, wanted it to go forward quicker and more effectively.
‘We need to get behind them’ I said and as though the lads heard us, Andy Robertson powered down the wing and put in an inviting cross which was missed. It was the way forward.
The commentator said about ‘The Ox’ having scored there for Arsenal. ‘And he did for Liverpool’, I pipped-up, having discovered by now that young baby Kelsey had sneaked behind the sofa, and sprung-up like a Jackie – in – the box, as soon as I saw her mop of golden hair.
Love her cotton socks.
Andy Robertson again got free after some more quick, slick passing and whipped in a ‘please score me’ ball which Origi missed at Fabianski’s right near post and also eluded Mo Salah.
‘We should have scored then!’ Deano said, exasperated.
Robertson then got put in by Mo Salah, after an intricate passing move but just failed to find the left bottom corner of Fabianski’s goal – this was more like it.
Liverpool, as it often has been the case this season, had grown into the game and moved up a few notches. They tigerishly began fighting for the ball higher-up the pitch and from this, Origi got fouled from near the six-yard box.
‘Pen-alt-tee!’ Deano bellowed, then added, ‘but hang on, let’s wait for VAR!’. How terrible, as it spoilt the moment but we can’t really complain this season.
It had to be Mo Salah to take it – though I did think about Bobby or Hendo. I was desperate for him to score, desperate for Liverpool to win – desperate for the – at this moment in time there seems to be a problem with my keyboard as it has refused me permission to write the ‘t’ word (no that’s enough, it just said!!!).
Mo Salah smashed home the spot-kick, putting it to Fabianski’s right.
‘YES! YES!’ I shouted, raising both arms aloft, as though I was lifting something shiny (now Andrew, I’m not going to tell you again, my keyboard just warned me, in my late father’s sternest voice!).
One nil up. The breakthrough. Tidy.
At one stage four players hounded the one West Ham player on the edge of his area.
‘That’s what I love to see!’ I shouted as Kelsey expressed her desire that I turn my volume down!
The home team had half chances but there was always Virgil van Dijk and the equally impervious Joe Gomes to snuff out any danger and of course Alisson.
At the break we were treated to not only a lovely cuppa made by Carly, God it was needed, but also Birthday Cake. Victoria sponge – it was lush! You see it was Davie’s 21st the day after! No, I can never recall how old he is – suffice to say at least ten years older than me; my range went from 32 to 38 for him. He liked the lower figure!
‘Thirty-eight Crouch’ he admitted. He didn’t look a day over 22!
Carly was going to treat him to a meal, ‘And maybe use your vouchers Crouch’ she suggested. It would be a change ‘just the two’ of them going out – without the kids. ‘Then maybe a drink on Saturday night’ – so that was something to look forward to.
Liverpool kept control. A strangle-hold but on rare occasions the Hammers attacked and they may as well have because Alisson kept the scoreline down to nil as he made two-point blank stops as Trent somehow managed to hit his right post and the ball rebounded out to Van Dijk to gratefully clear.
In between this though, Liverpool caught the home team with a sucker-punch. Blowing their bubbles right in the air.
From a West Ham attack, on the edge of the reds area, the ball was looped over the top, by Henderson if my memory serves me correctly and then Mo Salah was on it in a flash and with a delicious ball served it on a plate (which the finest five star chefs could not have conjured-up), as Mo flicked the ball with the outside of his left boot to send Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain arrowing in on goal, where he finished low and hard, into the bottom right of Fabianski’s goal.
More celebrations.
‘Done and Dusted’, Deano said.
Quick as a flash I replied, ‘That’s what you said Sunday and looked what happened!’.
‘He’s in my dream team’ Deano beamed, as again, with Carly already warning me, I flashed a middle finger at him and Davie but let Carly off with a verbal warning!
‘There’s only one team – LIVERPOOL!’ I shouted at them for the umpteenth time!
Liverpool should have scored more as I recall Bobby Firmino jigging his way through but not finding any end product as Liverpool toyed with the home team. They just seem to have a knack of slowing it down and going at their own pace and we later discussed this.
‘We will have to stop shouting and accept it. That this is the way they play now’. Too true Deano.
Curtis Jones came on and it was very heartening to see. I just feel that he is going to be more than a bit part player in less than a few years.
Kaitlyn, the middle girl had made an appearance and she was worried that she would get that virus which is spreading from China. What was she like!
‘It’s just a head cold’, Carly said, as Kaitlyn had wrapped herself-up in a wool-like top. Kids – who’d have them…
‘We’re champions of the world’ sang the travelling fans as some even dared to sing the other ditty which Deano pointed out to me.
‘Look Crouch, you’re not telling them off!’ whilst inwardly I was lapping it up but did not dare openly say it.
The fat lady, with the red dress and shoes, who could be asked to sing, is now maybe, just maybe, perhaps putting on her red lippy.
30/1/20. Andy C Legs 1474
Andy's Anfield Articles 